Why I physically attend church during a pandemic.

I am aware of what is happening in the world. I don’t live under a rock. (Though there are honestly times I wish I did these days!) And while we did not attend church physically at the start of the pandemic back in March/April for reasons not relating to the pandemic (two Autistic children and no tools to help us navigate places like church equals a tricky and often frustrating situation), sometime around May-ish we began attending physically again.

There are many that do not understand why we are choosing to attend church when everything is so crazy in the world. But that’s exactly why we attend.

You see, we tried “virtual church” and while we were so thankful for that option, there is absolutely nothing at all like being in the House of the Lord with other believers. Nothing. The atmosphere is electric. That atmosphere is where healing happens. In that atmosphere heavy baggage gets laid down. A great exchange happens…we exchange our hurts and aches for the peace that surpasses all understanding. It is in this place where we get the strength we need to keep going.

The suicide rate is up to an alarming rate right now. People are broken and hurting. The number of CHILDREN committing suicide is literally breaking my heart. I know the answer to that pain is Jesus. I know that for a fact actually because when I was a child and then also a young adult, I seriously contemplated suicide many times. In fact, at one point I had a bottle of ibuprofen in my hands. I was ready to go. I couldn’t take the pain anymore.

Enter Jesus.

He is the only reason I’m standing here today. He’s the ONLY solution that brought me back to life and continues to heal me daily. I have given Him all of me. He is the only one that has actually never let me down. He’s faithful and constant. He sends help in my time of need. He allows me to make choices…even the ones that might have negative consequences…so that He can lovingly show me the right way. The way He designed for me. The way that brings me life and breaks my chains. The way that sets my children free too.

And while there are miraculous stories of Him appearing to people for the first time in dreams and we can enter into the presence of God anywhere we are…there’s something about being around other believers. Something that cannot be replicated sitting on my couch watching a service on TV.

If you’ve never experienced this, it’s kind of like being at your favorite band’s concert. You know that electrifying feeling you all get as you stand there basking in the goodness of the music and the general vibe of the crowd? Imagine having that every Sunday…but the “band” is Jesus and you actually walk away encouraged because you’ve been in His presence and heard a sermon that you could swear was written just for you. You leave feeling fed somehow…like you just put down a heavy bag and someone gave you the deepest, warmest hug. There’s nothing like that. Nothing at all.

It is this experience that has personally gotten me through this pandemic. We are not created to live alone. We are created to live in relationship. And virtual chats are great but they’ll never replace being together. Even if you are 6 feet apart and not touching.

Side note: No church is perfect. Nobody is perfect. Hurts happen. Even in the church. And if we find that we have attended multiple churches and nothing seems to fit, it might mean something inside of us needs to change. If we keep looking for a perfect church, we will never find it. A good, solid church will inspire maturity. Iron sharpens iron. But if you never allow the iron to sharpen you, you will continue to stay stagnant and blame the church. (Of course this is not applicable to some churches where there is spiritual or other abuse. I am not suggesting we submit ourselves to that.) Eventually we have to grow up and grow into a church. That means asking Jesus where we belong and then setting our mind to stick it out no matter what we encounter. Choosing forgiveness over bitterness. Choosing love and acceptance even if we feel rejected. Pressing into a church family for better or for worse, and not running at the first sign of a hurt feeling. We can never belong if we don’t fully show up as ourselves! We can never feel someone’s love if we never open up our gates and let someone safe in. Thankfully we have found a church home where we feel safe.

Our church has taken major precautions to keep us safe through all this. That looks like investing in UV bulbs to annihilate any and all germs before and after service. Rows and seats are staggered to keep a healthy distance between everyone. Air high fives are encouraged. Smiles are encouraged. Hugs are not. All are welcome. All are loved. Grab a squirt of some hand sanitizer on your way to your seat and please stay home if you have been sick or exposed to anything unfavorable.

Our church is cleaner than a grocery store and the respect and love we have for each other is far greater than what happens in a grocery store. We understand what it takes to be able to attend church right now, so we play by the rules so that our religious freedom/right to worship isn’t taken from us. Though our hearts ache for those churches that have not been so fortunate.

The church is meant to be a hospital, and yet we are more concerned about the physical hospitals reaching capacity. May I suggest that perhaps those hospitals might not fill up so quickly if our spiritual hospitals were reaching capacity instead?

Fear is a thief and a liar. Fear tells us things will never change. Fear tells us that we will get sick and die. Fear tells us that we have no hope. Fear opens the door to disease and sickness. Fear kills us worse than a virus ever could.

But Jesus is the way, the TRUTH and the LIFE. He came so that we would have life in ABUNDANCE. (If your life isn’t feeling very abundant, do you have enough Jesus?) Jesus tells us that in HIM we always have Hope. The story isn’t over. The battle belongs to Him. He is our healing. He is good. He will protect us. He will never let us down.

This does not mean bad things will never happen. It does not even mean you will not contract the virus. I believe I had it back in March before things got bad. It doesn’t mean people won’t get sick and pass on. This is a natural part of life. Painful, albeit. And we could do everything in our power to try to stop the spread of a virus and it could still find its way to our loved ones. As much as we think we can control it, we just can’t. And the one thing that is tearing everyone apart throughout all of this is not actually the virus. It’s fear. Fear is dividing mothers and brothers and sisters and fathers and children and friends and churches and political sides. Your enemy is not your unmasked friend…your enemy is fear. And until we recognize the war we are in with fear, and allow the love of God to wash over all of it, we will continue to lack peace. We will continue to see division.

I do not run around licking door handles. I don’t let people cough in my face. I don’t do this pre-pandemic! I have learned to be proactive in my health and wellness instead of reactive and I have been sick one time (possibly the virus) in the last year plus. Take care of your immune system with things like quality supplements, quality essential oils, enough water, high frequency foods, and sleep! Manage your stress. Nobody can do that stuff for you — only you can. That’s all you can control. That’s literally it.

And pray. Pray for protection for you and your family and loved ones. Pray for the right answers to all of this. Pray for reconciliation. Pray that people would become aware of how fear is controlling and damaging their lives. Heart attack rates are up now too…and that has nothing to do with the virus and everything to do with fear and anxiety. Two things can be true: there can be a virus out there and we can be at peace. The Bible says to be anxious for nothing but to bring all your requests to Him. Lay it down. Get the great exchange. Choose to partner with peace. Then you won’t worry so much about what’s going on in the world, because your inner world will be at rest…even in the middle of the storm.

Peace that surpasses all understanding…and that’s only possible through Jesus.

Praying for you.

-Nikki