An Update on my Relationship with Food

Y’all are giggling about that headline, aren’t you?! Haha. That’s okay! I giggled too.

I wanted to quickly update you guys on my food journey. Many of you know that I started my year by doing The Daniel Fast. This fast allows you to eat legumes, nuts, seeds, veggies and fruits and anything without yeast (though it should be limited), as well as you can really only drink water. Everyone kind of follows different rules for this fast, but this is what we did.

This fast was literally hell for me. I’m not even lying right now.

I had so many ugly belief systems and mindsets and horrible behavior show up to the party that I wanted to throw the towel in — many times. But even if I ran from them for a day or two, I eventually found myself finally surrendering and giving those parts of me to Jesus. He woke me up every single night of the fast at 3am. Some nights I accepted the invitation to sit with Him and work through things, but honestly most nights I stared at the ceiling begging Him to just let me sleep. Haha.

I had some mindsets attached to eating beans and rice that needed to be removed. I believed that if I ate just beans and rice that it would mean I was poor. I also believed that the only thing we can eat for protein for breakfast was eggs. I actually think I have eaten eggs for breakfast every single day of my adult life. Whoa. I did not realize the stronghold eggs had on me! Well, it was really the mindset around it. By the time the fast was over, I was eating beans for breakfast and chickpeas, and I made some super yummy breakfasts with them! (Check out my black bean breakfast hash recipe!)

Overall, I would say that I had great success with the fast! I lost 10 pounds and multiple inches over the 3 weeks, so my body was VERY happy with the lack of major inflammatory foods. I really missed coffee, honestly. I enjoy a cup in the morning, but managed to be okay without it during the 21 days.

I shared more about my mindsets and the freedom I found over at the Oaks Rising Facebook page. I did one of their 1:11 activations and shared about this. Check it out if you want to walk through getting rid of some of the same mindsets!

So, what now? Well, I decided to start back up with an old app I was using. I thought for SURE it would be my jam. I was so excited to get back to doing what I was doing and join back up with the huge community! I even made the first week meal plan and announced to the world that I was ready to go! And on day one, I quickly realized that using that app again would be like going backwards for me. 🙁 I have done SO MUCH work over the last few years figuring out what my body likes/doesn’t like. I have learned how to eliminate dairy/sugar and eat clean. But everything we could afford for food for this app involved dairy or sugar. The first day my body completely rejected the food. I was miserable. And then the sad reality that I could not continue set in and I had to walk away.

So, what noooowwww? I’m going to combine the positive eating habits I learned from doing both Whole30 AND The Daniel Fast. My body has responded the most positively from both of those. I am also working on allowing the Holy Spirit to lead me in my eating. I heard the terms “Intuitive Eating” the other day, and I felt like that pretty well summed it up! I have been doing this all long enough now to know what my body needs and now it’s just a matter of putting it into practice and really listening to what it’s saying to me. A better way to describe it for me is “Holy Spirit-led Eating.” He knows what my body needs better than I do, so why not seek His counsel on this?

I am also not comfortable with obsessing over exercise, as I was already starting to do when I re-joined the app. I worked really hard to break the cycle of punishment exercise, and going back onto such a strict regiment was already triggering me. My new exercise goal is to move every day, somehow. That might look like a dance party with my kids, or taking them to the park, or on a walk, or forcing myself to walk when I want to sit. It may even look like eventually getting a membership to the Y and using some weights and machines or a pool. But I am not going to limit myself to anything anymore. I want to do this with FREEDOM!

I have learned that every day is not a “one size fits all” kind of day. Every day is going to be different with different challenges. A strict routine that doesn’t allow for variation or going with the flow is going to stifle me really quickly. I love the spontaneity of life, and I also appreciate routine and order. So my “order” looks like meal planning for the week, but knowing that even though my little meal plan calendar says it’s tacos on Tuesday, I might wake up one morning and decide to eat Meatloaf instead. Or I may plan to go for a walk one day and it turns into a nasty ice storm, so I have a dance party with my kiddos instead! Please hear my heart — order and structure is GOOD! I support it! But I also have learned what my body and mind and soul need, and it is freedom within the structure.

How you can be praying for me: Please pray that I can get into a really good rhythm with the clean eating and moving every day. Pray that I can also find ways to get my kiddos in line with those goals as well! I want us all to be happy and healthy together. 🙂

Thank you for praying for me and for coming along on this journey with me! 🙂
Blessings,
~Nikki